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Tue, Apr. 11th, 2006, 10:04 pm
I am dead

I am lost beyond words now. He has a new profile that says he is single, looking for a long-term relationship, and that he is GAY, not BI anymore.

All of the emotional scabs I had built were ripped violently off in the moment I saw his new profile. I still have not had any form of closure. No word from him or his family at all. No why. No sorry, I want to move on. Nothing at all. No explantion of if he is single, and GAY, and looking, why he lied to, cheated on, and dumped me.

His interests are ironic, because I met and exceeded what he is looking for... I NEED to know why.

I am going to wait a week to see if I hear from him, or his family, and if I do not, my Myspace page will be a reminder of me. I cannot deal with this pain any longer. I need it to end, either by closure, by apologetic future potential, or death, but I cannot take it anymore.

If you or your mother read this, my life is depending on your contacting me. Not fair? Neither is what you are doing to me. I love(d) you.

Wed, Apr. 12th, 2006 05:09 am (UTC)

Well hun for what it's worth I hope they contact you. From what I know of the situation it sounds like he owes you an explanation, and probably an apology. Although I don't think his mother should be involved in this anymore because it would only damage the situation rather then repair anything I think...the more involved the more complicated, the less positive things can be.

I love you and am thinking of you as always. Whether you're here or not you'll always be here *holds her hands to her heart* and you'll always be a treasured friend.

Hopefully when I get home in a week you'll still be around and I will be able to give you a call if I can breathe well enough to have more then a five minute conversation without coughing up a lung. In the meantime, be well, may the Lord and Lady bless and keep you no matter your choice.


Wed, Apr. 12th, 2006 05:11 am (UTC)

I am trying, but it is hard... It hurts so much...

All the scabs, open and bleeding again...